In Case You Haven't Noticed.

There are so many things I could say to you right now.

So many thoughts I want to get out, but can't seem to find the words.

So I'll write out the many things that are going through my head.

In case you haven't noticed, a lot has changed about me.

In case you haven't noticed, I'm a very different person.

In case you haven't noticed, I've taken charge of my life.

In case you haven't noticed, I don't allow people to walk all over me.

In case you haven't noticed, I'm stronger now.

In case you haven't noticed, I'm confidant.

In case you haven't noticed, I'm radiating confidence.

In case you haven't noticed, I. Am. Beautiful.

In case you haven't noticed, you did not break me.

In case you haven't noticed, you did not win.

In case you haven't noticed, I survived the wounds you left on my heart.

In case you haven't noticed, my wounds have healed perfectly.

In case you haven't noticed, I'm happy.

In case you haven't noticed, I. Am. Back.

Worthy

I am the beautiful one.

I am the smart one.

I am the funny one.

I am the creative one.

I am the wise one.

But shall I tell you a secret?

There are days when I feel hideous.

There are days when I feel like a moron.

There are days when I think I'm dull.

There are days when I feel useless.

There are days when I can't give advice.

There are even days when I feel like my whole life is one big, cosmic joke.

And I know, rationally speaking, that this is ridiculous.

But there's a part of my brain, this tiny, evil, irrational part,

That tells me these lies.

And it takes hours of self reassurance to convince myself otherwise.

People call me conceited because I spend so much time talking about how awesome I am.

Only one person on this earth understands why I do this.

Oddly enough, he's the one person I know who does the exact same thing.

For the exact same reason.

Because even though we're both amazing,

Our brains are somehow messed up.

For some reason, our brains are wired to tell us these lies.

And we have to work so so unbearably hard to convince ourselves it's not true.

But when you have someone to do it for you, it becomes much easier.

When I have someone else to focus on,

I feel better about myself.

I feel like I'm making a difference.

So Christian, I will randomly text you and post on your Facebook.

I will come up to in the middle of the day and give you a hug.

All of this I'll do in the hopes that you'll start to do the same for me.

Because we are both worthy of love,

And we are perfect for each other.

Even if you don't know it yet.